My kids are monsters. And I didn’t know.
Yesterday, I had an awful headache so I came home after my classes were done, around 1:45pm. I laid down, and had some peace and quiet for about an hour until Hubby came home with the kids at 3pm. I stayed in the bed though, because I didn’t think they really needed me.
That’s when the shenanigans started.
I could hardly believe my ears. The way they treated their father was AWFUL. They yelled and screamed, complained and whined. I could hardly believe that they were my children.
Because see: they don’t act that way with me. Not that they are perfect angels, far from it, but they know I. Don’t. Play. That. Yell at me? Oh hell naw. Complain? Then you get nothing. I’ll throw it in the trash with the quickness. Whine? Go and sit on your bed. And consistently do what you want instead of what I said? Well, then, I go old school.
My husband inherently has a gentler nature than I do. He just doesn’t do mean very well. He gives a lot of warnings, but not a lot of consequences. He also seems to think that this is just how the children act.
But when he gets fed up, he goes from 0 to 100 in an instant, and doesn’t have a middle ground. So on the rare occasions that he gets fed up, I’m horrified by his methods. I’m reminded of the episode of Modern Family where Phil and Claire change places, with Phil taking on the role of the bad cop. My husband, when given the go ahead to be harsh, is like Phil, the good cop turned bad. “Have the kids eaten?” “They don’t deserve food!” “Did you read them a book before bed?” “Books are treats!”
Well, it’s not as bad as that, but kinda close. So it means that I have to be the (consistent) bad cop, which I don’t really mind being. It’s a tricky balance: I want my kids to be respectful and nice to be around, and I guess I want them to like me. Consistency goes a long way toward both of those things, b/c they know exactly what they are going to get from me. On the other hand, while I’d like my husband to be more consistent, it’s just not in his nature. And I don’t want my husband to be driven to torture them.