I thought my kids did a great job this afternoon with homework and stuff, so I let them ride their bikes to the “corner store” to get whatever they wanted for $2. They got candy, of course. They ate a lot of it. One didn’t really eat dinner, but that’s on me, right? Fine.
Tonight, as I’m reading our book, One Crazy Summer, I hear paper rattling from the bunk beds. First time, I let it go. Second time, I’m like, “what are you doing?”
Me: “what do you have up there?”
Answer: holds up MY ipad.
Sigh. But I know that’s not it.
Me: “Ok. What else?”
Now I’m hot. “Gonna ask you one mo gin. What else do you have up there?”
Answer: Holds up an opened Starburst + the rest of the pack.
Mind you – this wasn’t one of their candy that they bought earlier. This was a pack of candy on MY dresser from days ago. So not only did you lie about what you were doing, you also STOLE from my dresser, taking something that was clearly not yours.
I HATE when my kids lie. I try to give so many opportunities to have fun — they aren’t hurting for candy! And there are very few things I hate more than LYING. If we can’t trust each other, then our relationship suffers. Furthermore, character means more to me than ANYTHING else – I want to raise good, just people.
It’s hard to express that to a grade schooler, and of course, they need to be given opportunities to mess up and be corrected. But lying hurts my heart. And it really challenges me as a parent.
I did something wrong too: once I knew something was up, I shouldn’t of asked questions. Questions encourage lying. I should have said, “Show me what you have.” Perhaps I would have headed off the lie, and only dealt with the theft. I also should have known something was up, and encouraged truth telling. But I didn’t.
What do you do when your kids lie?
P.S. I have other things to share (like officially finishing!!!) but this was an immediate concern. I’ll update soon.